Walking into the Unknown

This past year has been one filled with differing thoughts and emotions as I ventured out in faith from my position at Northern Seminary. Throughout this whole time I know it has been the right decision for me for this phase of my life -- there are many names that people give to such a journey such as moving from success to significance, rediscovering oneself at the midpoint of one's life, even mid-life crisis. This journey is one of discovery, but also one that ventures out embracing fear of the unknown -- not so much in where God is leading, but in wondering if I am hearing clearly enough and whether I have the courage to follow.

There are times when I sense that I am trusting God in the journey and I know beyond a doubt that the direction of my life and the meeting of the needs of my family is fully in God's hands -- and I am at peace. At other times I am filled with questions, with doubt, wondering am I discerning the direction clearly, am I being irresponsible in regard to caring for my family, especially as it relates to financial concerns.

No matter what kind of day I find that I am strengthened when I refocus on on seeking first God's kingdom, realizing that there is no other place for me to be (Matthew 6:33). When I am overwhelmed with doubt, it is refocusing on God and God's leading -- remembering the signposts in my life where God has clearly indicated that I am following in the way he is leading -- that I rediscover the peace that is beyond all understanding.

Life and ministry are meant to be an adventure and as long as I walk with God, with Jesus Christ, with an openness to the Spirit, my walking, though unknown to me as to where I am headed, is not unknown to God.

I encourage all of us as followers of Jesus Christ to discover the peace of not taking control of our own destinies, but to rely on walking with Christ, even if it is through the "valley of the shadow of death" (Psalm 23).

Peace,
Roland